Posted in Life, Mental Health Awareness, Tips/Advice

The Cost of holding your feelings in

I was having a heart to heart conversation with a good friend and he was saying how he had a death of a loved one recently and how he usually doesn’t talk to his feelings or things that are going on. And I went on this little rant on how it is important for people to talk about their feelings.

And I can’t stress how important it is to talk about your feeling and not hold it in.

When you hold it in, it’s extremely bad for your mental health, just like holding grudges. It just holds this negativity in you that you don’t even need. It creates this giant negativity cloud inside of you and it could just really mess with your mind and emotions.

If you’re only thinking about what happened in the past and holding it over you, you become more paranoid, anxious and guarded and that doesn’t help you or anyone around you.

I was like that most of my teenage years and after stepped out of myself and looking at what went wrong with a lot of my past was that I was too stuck in the past. I was so scared of the past repeating itself, I put up walls for everyone I met. And it drove them away, I made it extremely difficult for them to get close to me or to help me. And that wasn’t a great feeling for me, because it made me feel even more unlovable and that no one cared about me. And it hurt them because they didn’t feel good enough because they couldn’t close enough and help me like they wanted to.

I know the world isn’t always in a great place and there are bad people out there who just like to cause and inflict pain, but if you’re in the mindset that everyone is bad.. well, you’re really going to miss out on some great people. People who could actually be a great influence or could better your life. I always like to think that every person that comes in my life is put there for a positive reason. If even they hurt me, I try to understand and look at the bigger picture with it.

The cost of holding your feeling in, holding a grudge and even hating people, to me, I believe that it can really hurt your mental and emotional state. It can also in the end, reduce your life. when you mental and emotional state is at a constant worry and stressed out, it wrecks your immune system, which causes you to be more prone of getting sick. And you know sickness can kill you (very unlikely, but let’s be real.. being sick sucks and you get very miserable).

No one is worth having a stuffy nose, sore throat and having that cough that keep you up all night over. So try not to stress yourself out by holding a grudge or holding your feeling in or hating people. It’s seriously not worth it.

If someone hurts you, or makes you cry.. take your time dealing with it but don’t get revenge or get even. Don’t hold a grudge and when it’s time, forgive them. Because you need to let that grudge go. Do better in your life, find your own sunshine and happiness.

Holding your feelings in is just like waiting for a volcano to erupt. And that’s really not healthy. Like I told my friend who inspired this post, what you can do is, talk to a close friend (I’m even here. Just message me on social media or email me. I’ll be there), write it down. But don’t keep it bottled up. If you like art, paint or draw about it. Write a story out of it, dance about it. Just do something that doesn’t keep it bottled up.

I was never great at bottling my feelings up because I’m way too emotional. I’ll explode so easily, so I use to dance to release that negative energy and it worked. You have to find something that helps you release that negative energy, and it really does make you feel better.

I challenge you to talk to your feelings, next time you are down, anxious, mad, upset, etc. Talk to someone you trust, me, go on a mental health app or site (Apps  I can suggest is Talklife and Vent). And I also challenge you to write every day or every week. Write the date, what happened in your day, your overall feelings, the good that happen and the bad that happen and an inspiration quote that will motivate you for tomorrow.

As always, keep it open and keep it dorky.

With lots of love,

Jade ❤



Mental Health Advocate. Future Counselor and Mental Health Educator. A superhero in training. Here to save the world by spreading some love and positivity! 😊 If you want to learn more, click "About your friend, Jade" at the top of the site :)

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